a story from the past

I don't generally visit the past but a post with a nephew brought a unique story to mind and I laughed my ass off.

During our Viet Nam time I was Navy Corpsman. Many duties followed but this is a an early time.
A Soap-Suds enema: a what? Yea, I had been taught about enemas but , sucking chest wounds, traumatic amputations, and punji stick penetrations were my primary concerns. So, soap-suds enema? OK, patient X needed to shit: Dr. ordered an enema, OK. So I ask the ward nurse , how, she says to get the enema bucket, a 2 qt. thing with a handle and a spout at the bottom that you attached a latex hose to and fill it with warm water then shave in a quarter bar of Ivory soap. Shave in I say, and she say Yes, shave in using your knife, you do have a knife, don't you? Well yes I said, who doesn't have a knife. Well, these kids today don't have knives I find out. so I shave the soap, place the patient on his left side and as any good nurse will, I tell him what I'm going to do. Well, you can only imagine what this sailor thought about this!~! So in my masculine and reassuring voice I explained how this procedure would make him feel better, he allowed me to stick this small shower head up his ass and turn on the suds. Didn't take long for the affects. He said STOP! I said , little more. Soon he was off the gurney and headed to the head, spraying shit all the way. Post-procedure nursing notes noted successful results and patient resting comfortably. No mention of the mess I had to clean-up. Any future enemas I instructed and left the room. Oh Hell Yes!!! So where are these trauma cases? They soon came!!! Just another sad story I try to hide, but this was funny to all. Shit everywhere! The Newport Naval Hospital was a spooky place to begin with. It was built for the Spanish- American War and not too upgraded. It was here I had my most profound experience with the other side. Story later. Strange times!!

Nilla Waffers

The search for F'n vanilla waffers was a trip. I had been given some nice bananas and Mom got on a tangent about makine banana pudding. Ok, we had the fruit and the pudding, but no cookies. No big deal, or so I thought. During my regular grocery shop I looked for the cookies. They no have. No biggie not unusual for island life. Next day, " you get the waffers?". So when I went out that day I stopped by another store, they no have either. A special stop just for cookies! So to K-Mart I go, no waffers. Three stores in three days, and I really hate shopping. On the way back I pass a store I don't enjoy shoppping in but thought I should give a try. Well there they were. These tiny boxes of nilla waffers. Yea! Nilla Waffers!!! Never seen them in such small boxes but they got'm. $3.00 each! Oh well, make mom happy, get two. And that's my story. Mom was happy, the pudding was good, the rum was better, and we are living well untill the food crave. Cheers all!